Friday, November 2, 2018

Tool for the Journey #38 - Throw your knapsack over the wall




When I was young I collected quotes and sayings. I was inspired by all the little bits of wonder and wisdom I’d discover with each new quote. I was intrigued to read about new ways of looking at things. When I was 16 years old someone gave me a quote which had a significant impact on me and even all these years later I still remember it:

Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation) there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too.

All sorts of things occur to help one which would not otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favour all manner of unforseen incidents and meetings and material assistance which no man would have dreamed would come his way.

I have learned a deep respect for one of Goethe’s couplets:

“Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it! Boldness has genius, magic, and power in it.”

W.H. Murray
from The Scottish Himalayan Expedition
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This tool for the journey is one I’ve carried with me. These wise words from W.H. Murray and Johann Wolfgang Goethe made a deep impression, and I've done my best to live by the code of these words...I've tried to be bold. I've taken risks when the stronger impulse was to turn back, to run towards safety.

“Throw your knapsack over the wall!” You might be asking, ‘what does that even mean?’ Well, imagine you’re on a grand adventure, and as you make your way down the road you come to a massive wall. The direction you’re going is blocked by this barrier and it’s a very real impediment to your progress. You’re traveling alone, the wall is far taller than you can easily climb, and there’s no way around it. What do you do? You can give up. You can decide to change your goal, change your dream and your direction, turn back. Or you could decide to commit to getting over that wall.

“…the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too.”

You commit yourself when you throw your knapsack over the wall! You hoist your pack, you raise your arms high – feeling both the weight of the pack and the weight of the decision you’re about to make - and you toss it with all of your might up and over the wall! Everything changes as soon as you release the straps and you see your knapsack flying through the air, disappearing out of sight with all of your belongings, all of your security. As soon as you make that ‘commitment’ you KNOW you’re going to find a way over that wall no matter what! And in that moment, as Mr. Murray said: “…then providence moves too.”

This tool is about the hidden power held within that level of commitment. Not everyone has it in themselves to commit in this ‘no turning back’ sort of way. Most people don’t. There’s no shame in turning back, no disgrace in making a different choice when faced with insurmountable odds. Frankly, it’s what most humans do. But if you can muster whatever it is inside us that gives us the courage to say YES to seemingly impossible challenges then you’ll witness something truly spectacular. You'll be granted access to a deep well of resources you may not have known existed beforehand. In that moment you are both adventurer and also alchemist to your own life!

Here is another quote which impacted me in my youth:

“Ask yourself what you really want. Not what you think is possible in your particular circumstances, but without any restrictions. The answer will tell you who you are.”
       – Werner Erhard

I’ve thought about this often over the course of my life. What do I really want? The only thing I’ve always wanted is to be of service. To somehow do good in the world. To touch hearts and leave the world and the people in it better in some way. This has been a burning desire since I was a child and has definitely impacted the choices and decisions I’ve made. It has driven me to throw my knapsack over the wall time and time again.

Making the commitment to throw one’s knapsack over the wall is a decision replete with uncertainly and yet also exhilaration. There’s the thrill of committing yourself to something you’re passionate about, something larger than yourself, which speaks a foreign language that still somehow reaches the depths of your soul with understanding. Tossing the pack over the wall is a soul-pledge; you do it because you must. You make a pact with Providence even though you have no idea how to get from here to there, and even though you can’t begin to imagine how you’ll ever achieve the desired end result. It’s a prayer, a promise and an act of faith which asserts that even though we may feel alone….somehow we know we’re not. It’s about shooting for the stars even though you don’t have a rocket ship!

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe tells us: “Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it! Boldness has genius, magic, and power in it.”

It’s a bold move to throw your knapsack over the wall. Some might call it stupid; others would likely call us crazy or reckless. And just because we make the bold move, make the commitment, take the risks, this doesn’t mean we’ll be successful. However, regardless of the outcome we’ll undoubtedly learn something about ourselves in the process, and perhaps this is the more important point. By making the commitment we gain access to the genius, magic and power (and the immense love) of the Unseen World. Whether you call them angels, guides, departed loved ones or God - there is ‘help’ available to us if we are bold enough to commit ourselves, with love and intention, to something larger. “A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for.” So says, John Shedd.

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. – (authorship is debated:  either Mark Twain or H. Jackson Brown)

Within me there has always been an inexorable desire to move towards the unknown; to explore what cannot be seen but absolutely can be felt. By what I can only describe as grace, I've been blessed to experience profound depths and also great heights. I’ve been shown in undeniable, spectacular ways what’s possible out beyond the edges of what is visible. These gifts were bestowed, I believe, because I was willing to trust in the unseen and throw my knapsack over the wall.

I know a blind man who climbed the tallest mountains in the world and a deaf woman who can sing with perfect pitch. I know a man who lost both of his legs and decided to figure out how to build betters ones to replace the legs he lost. It isn’t what happens to us that matters, it’s how we respond to what happens which shapes us, defines our future and can cause good ripples that change the world. My friend, Erik Weihenmayer says: “What’s within you is stronger than what is in your way.” And I, for one, believe he’s right!

Vanquish fear. Conquer doubt. Trounce hesitation. Claim victory over the smaller self who would have you turn back from your dreams. Voltaire wrote: “Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget to sing in the lifeboats; life is a desert, but we can transform our corner into a garden.” Find your way down the brave path. Seek like minds. Be grateful. Notice grace. Make of your heart a garden and sing the song you came here to sing. Harness your courage, muster your strength, take risks and when the walls appear – as they always do – raise your arms up and throw your knapsack over the wall with complete trust that those Unseen Forces, filled with immense love, will be right there to help you over the top!

In-Joy,
Cheryl